“Hi Karen!”
Well, hello, Iggy!
“Welcome home!”
Thank you!
“Know what I did today?”
What did you do today?
“Nothing! Oh, wait, I stuck out my tongue.”
You did?
“Oh, no, hang on, that’s what I’m doing now. I didn’t do that before. I forgot what I did before.”
That’s okay, Iggy.
“But yeah, probably nothing much.”
That’s fine, as long as you had a nice day.
“Yeah. It was nice.”
Good for you! Who’s a happy Iggy?
“Me! I’m a happy Iggy!”
Yes you are! Good boy!
“And I definitely didn’t chew the coffee table!”
Good Ig– wait, what?
“I didn’t chew the coffee table. Um… that was… um… Brian.”
You know it wasn’t me, Iggy.
“LA LA LA LA BRIAN WE CAN’T HEAR YOU LA LA LA LA LA!”
Iggy, stop that. I heard Brian just fine.
“No you didn’t. Heard who?”
Wonderful.
“Happy Iggy!”
The Iggy Dialogues 
How do dogs do that and not end up with splinters in their gums???
It’s a gift. That, or the fact that the table’s really cheap and doesn’t splinter so much as dissolve.
Oh Iggy, you’re half rabbit, cutie-pie :p
Half rabbit, half goat. 🙂
Iggy was customizing your table. You now have an Iggy Original. He was saving you from the embarrassment of having a table like other people have. Good Boy Iggy! 🙂
Oui — Iggy est tres chic. Note that in this context, “chic” is French for “gleefully destructive.” 🙂