“Hey Karen?”
Not now, Iggy. I have to list 15 blogs for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award.
“Can’t.”
Well yeah, it’s difficult to narrow down, but it’s not impossible —
“No, you can’t ‘cause I wanna go outside.”
You can wait a little while.
“No!”
Excuse me, did you just say no?
“Gotta pee.”
Oh. Okay. Where’s your leash?
“Where you left it.”
You know, other dogs, when they have to go out, go get the leash and bring it to whoever is going to walk them.
Why?
Well, it’s a nice thing to do. Plus it tells the person when the dog needs to be walked.
“I already tell you when I need to be walked.”
Yes. By getting hysterical and scratching everything in sight. I was hoping you could find a way that would do less damage. Just to save me money.
“My way works.”
Other ways work too.
“Sure! Like peeing on the carpet. I mean, I don’t think scratching smells as much, but if you prefer –”
Never mind. Come on.
“Nice day for it.”
Hurry up, Iggy — I need to get back inside and come up with that list.
“Fine, I’m done. Wait a minute –”
What?
“Well, hello, little mousedog!”
Yip yip yip yip yip!
Oh, no, Iggy, don’t start with the neighbor’s dog.
“It’s not a dog — it’s a barking hamster!”
Yip yip yip yip yip!
Yip yip yip yip yip!
“Oh, you have GOT to be kidding me!”
“What, is there a nest of you freaks in a drainpipe or something? Do I need to put out traps?”
Yip yip yip yip yip!
“Hang on, are you snarling? WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT? Those aren’t teeth!”
Yip yip yip yip yip!
Iggy, come on, we’re going home now.
“Seriously, my groomer has nastier weapons than those teeth, and the only thing she ends up doing to me is making me smell like flowers!”
COME, Iggy. Right NOW!
“Fine. By the way, Karen, we gotta talk about that thing with the groomer and the smells. It’s ‘therapy dog,’ not ‘aromatherapy dog.'”
Oh, do you want to be a therapy dog?
“No. Your issues are your problem.”
It’s not that kind of therapy.
“Don’t care. Can you please do something about that groomer about her smells?”
Hey, I don’t like it either. It’s just a whole new way for you to give me a headache.
“Hey!”
Now go sit quietly while I give people the list of bloggers that I’m nominating for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award.
“Fine.”
Hello, readers. During my walk with Iggy it occurred to me that 15 links is a lot not only for me, but for you. I’m going to link to blogs that I enjoy and that I hope you enjoy as well, but it’s pretty difficult for you to sit back and enjoy them if you get over a dozen thrown at you all at once. So instead, I’m going to do five per day over three days, so you have time to check out all of the blogs.
“Wow! You can rationalize laziness like no human I’ve ever seen!”
Damned right, Iggy! Anyway, readers, here are the first five, in no particular order. Some of them have been nominated in the past, but not by me, so I think it still counts.
The Indecisive Eejit. Because her blog isn’t so much a blog as a party, and she’s the best party hostess on the Interwebs.
Ben’s Bitter Blog. Every post is a new way to view things negatively, and he inspired me to be ashamed to have seen Gravity.
The Mental Mama. A bit about life, a bit about work, a bit about the ups and downs of relationships, a bit about living with bipolar disorder, and a whole lot of humor.
Days and Months. I love reading blogs kept by people who live far away, and seeing their countries through their eyes. Days and Months is by Karen Gosper in New South Wales, who is working on her photography skills, and treating us to the gorgeous results.
Forgotten NZ. In the same vein as Days and Months, but she photographs abandoned and forgotten structures in New Zealand.
Five more tomorrow.
“You’re milking this award thing so you don’t have to think of new stuff to post every day, aren’t you?”
Yes, Iggy, I am. What a smart boy!