In which I scar my dog for life.

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Hi, Iggy. What are you doing?

“Chewing on Kermit.”

That’s practically cannibalism, you know.

“What’s cannibalism?”

Eating your own.

“Eewwww. Disgusting! But I’m not a Muppet.”

You sure?

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“AAAAGGGHHH!”

Yeah, it was mean. Serves him right for eating my wallet.